You won't get eaten at S.F. Zoo anymore, but you won't have any money left over for popcorn, either

San Francisco Zoo had a little "oopsies!" last year when a group of teens/young adults *allegedly* taunted a tiger that had never climbed out of its enclosure before. Whether they taunted or didn't taunt, the tiger found something especially delightfully delicious about that particular trio and did something no San Francisco tiger had ever done before - climbed out of her substandard enclosure and went a-huntin' for a taste of Dhaliwal*. This was not the economic high-point of their year. The zoo is now running a deficit.

It got me wondering - how bad are zoo prices in San Francisco? Well, not much worse than a movie, but, then again, the zoo pays their stars in grass, hay, kibble, mice... Here's how some zoos stack up:

City Adult/Child admission
(Generally, children under 3 are free, children over 10-13 are charged as adults)
San Francisco:
Sacramento: $9.50/7
San Diego: $35/26
Portland, Oregon: $10.50/7.50
Bronx, NY: $15/11
Queens, NY: $7/3
Boston, MA: $13/7
Minnesota: $16/10
Columbus, OH: $12/7
Chicago: Free
Washington D.C.: Free
Topeka: $5.25/3.75

You take an upper class family, they can take their kids on Safari. A middle class family can send their kids to a school with regular zookeeper visits. But poor family can raise a little genius, too, because they have access to so many stimulating experiences in American cities. Museums, Shakespeare in the Park, matinee concerts, libraries - this is the American dream, rags to riches on nothing more than pluck, perseverance, determination, sacrifice and enough love for a parent to get off their butt and schlep around to cultural experiences that narrow the gap between rich and poor. America became a leader, a beacon to immigrants from throughout the world - because we offered equality of opportunity, not because we offered really good food stamps.

And God bless 'em all. How many privileged middle class families do you see that can't be bothered to slap their child and say "you say please when you order the Barista to bring you a latte, young man! And pull your pants up!" You show me a young, poor, struggling single parent spending evenings and weekends parenting, and I'll show you 5 entitled middle-class or better families that think parenting is a fun hobby, one that should never be corrupted with discipline, responsibility or, you know, parenting.

I am a bit saddened the cost of taking children to the zoo is so high in so many cities. One of the beautiful facets of American life is that we make a tremendous amount of cultural and educational experiences available and accessible for all families. I'm not saying the government needs to guarantee every kid an annual zoo pass. A lot of zoo funding comes from committed donors, fundraisers, and volunteers. I think the 1 adult+1 child=$20 zoos should really look at their financial management and their business model. I'll tell you what, if I can walk into the zoo for free when I have a free hour, I am more likely to expose my child to the wonders of the world beyond our hometown - and I am also more likely to buy my kid the $5 ripoff bottled water, or the annual membership or the full retail priced book in the gift shop. You still get the money, but we all get to feel better about it, and the poor families still get to stimulate their children's intellectual growth.


* Yes, the Dhaliwal's friend, a young man reported to have been a pillar of society whose biggest flaw was hanging around with friends who had been arrested before and were arrested again, he is dead and his parents are now mourning the loss of their beloved son. I am sorry for their pain, and I realize that my opening paragraph is in somewhat poor taste with respect to those parents' feelings. But my BS meter really dislikes implausible stories, and it loathes implausible stories that then result in fat payouts to the people spouting the implausible stories, especially when said payout is likely to be used to pay criminal defense attorneys.

CaptchaKu Haiku by Captcha

I seem to get interesting word combinations from Captcha. Today's entry:

Morning Upon
Taiwan Periled
Overlooks Inquiry
Following Finding
Electoral Complete

Although, perhaps it meant Iran.